Suozzi-licious

Let me first get this out of the way and say what every woman and gay man thinks when they see Tom Suozzi.

He's fucking HOT...

I know this is an area more appropriate for the Gawker pages, but after watching the feed from his appearance this morning on Kirtzman and, er, Kramer (what happened to just Co? Kramer is ANN-OY-ING) I must admit, I melted once again. Maybe "melting" is the wrong word, but for the sake of keeping this post PG-13, I'll leave it at that.

Is it the wispy hair gently coiffed, or the mini-Gorbachev-esque mole on the side of his face? Could it be the strong manly conviction he stakes out, adorned by his lispy articulation?

**Sigh**

Methinks it's all of the above...

Now concerning the campaign. Suozzi, it's time to pack it up. I understand your desire to be a maverick, but your strategy is straight out of cuckoo-land. I could point out specifics, and under any other circumstance I would, but why ruin a good slow-summer post filled with hormonally pubescent airs with tedious (and fairly obvious) critiques.

Just one thing - remember what Oprah says, "“Luck is a matter of preparation meeting opportunity."

You may have the preparation, but in this field right now, you don't have the opportunity.

Consequently, you're shit out of luck.

And, with that, Mr. Suozzi, on this hot summer day, I offer an ode that stretches deep within my (usually non-existent) inner-sappiness.



I know, cheeseball factor of 12.5 on a scale of 1 to 10. But, hey, he's just too Suozzi-licious not to.

- Greg